I've created my own private Hell Trapped in my little shell Since I let another in The pain never ends I reach the borders And step outside Only to get slapped So I step back inside I go a little deeper this time To protect my mind Or should that be my heart? I don't know, I just play the part Later on I come outside And stand up true But you begin to treat me As if you never knew me So I retreat again And search for my friend The little girl inside me Who tries so hard to be Time passes and I feel a little bold So I return again To the outside To the cold I see you standing there So righteous and so sure When throughout my soul I show you that I'm pure I open my mouth to speak But the words MUST come out all wrong Because you turn to me And say what I am isn't strong So once again I return to my friend Who believes the world is true And only wants to start anew More time passes And I reach out of my shell To touch your hand And wish you well I tell you of my plight And the fear I feel in the night You look the other way And ask me then "why stay?" I try to explain That my love for you Is deep and true I want to work it out You begin to shout And tell me why I'm wrong And how you are strong It's all too much for me Can't you see That I just try to be Yet you push me down And wear a frown When I ask of you a need For I have many And I am fragile Why can't you handle me gently?
Reason for writing:
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View more poems by Nikki Cater - Aries.