cHaRiS

by Leokadia Awen (Pisces) - Not entered

Walk slowly in quiet reverance
Stoop lowly to seek your penance
It's a gentle ritual
Not meant for an individual

They could have taught me so much more
Why do the candles burn like that
Teach me what happens when I sing
How do the angels receive their wings
So many questions left unanswered
Did the pagans really speak...?
Did they love the moon as much as I
And did you make them feel weak?

Why, why am I wrong?
What is this word at the end of the song
Oh sir, you mistook my question
You're leading me in the opposite direction

How immature, I think to the cross
Why can I not make this decision
So careful and cautious
And I don't like to believe in lies
Do you see me
Nothing more than a sinner
When you look deep into my painstricken eyes?

Help me, I'm not that proud
But mother said I shouldn't talk that loud
No, tell me, I'll listen and try not to doubt
I just want to know what it's all about

I wasn't always good in history
But some say I have a remarkable memory
It couldn't take faith's place
And it couldn't fill the empty
And I feel like I'm praying...
Just in case

Why sir, why can't you make me believe
Why can't you instill this hope in me
No sir, no I'm not naive
Is asking for reasons blasphemy?

Is this really a mission
Damning everyone into submission
You've left me so far behind
Is this really a Christian?
Shhhhh...don't speak, listen...

Yes it's because I'm young
Dangling off the bottom rung
Is it so wrong to understand
The Mystery...
The Son of Man?

And you took my hand and led me 
To the very farthest regions of the earth
And I never saw heaven
Except when you weren't around...
Raw power, endless beauty
That no mortal chains had bound
When the leaves fell off the tree
It was dismissed 
Yet when I fell into the wind
Such understanding could never exist

So tell me why
You who rewrite Scripture
The learned theologian
Who has made parchment his venture
Are you part and parcel
As am I 
Where are you going 
When you die...

But sir...you said you're not allowed to judge
Oh I see...
I'm not...
Forgive my stupidity
So which way will you go...

I really don't think you know.

So step up, step up for glory
Yes yes I believe you're holy
Holier than me
And thou,
And I know you're thinking He
But you can't say it, oh no
Because then they will know you're speaking lies
As I already do...just by looking into your eyes
Is it a talent?
Am I gifted?

I sigh to myself, why do I ask you
Behind the pulpit reading words
That you like to think you know
And you hope your wonder doesn't show
For then what shall we do?

I sigh...the transparent eye
Part and parcel...

So sirs, I will commit
To your order
And submit
But all the time I'm thinking
How may I deny my heart
And you tell me I am blackened
Coarse and left out in the dark
Which came first...
And it was here before the earth
A drink unto creation
Break the bread unto salvation
And He...He created the universe...
Yet you claim it a curse

So please...step aside for us diseased
The wretched souls--with scabbed knees
Tormented souls of hurt and spite
Let our wrongs justify your right
Take hold of my darkness
Just to stain--taint it--with your light

Yes, yes, welcome to the underworld
Please exit to the right

I'm hoping I will too
But when the time is near at hand
The chains have snapped from off this land
That raw power, that endless beauty...
What shall you do--
Sir?

Will you love me too?
Sir?

Please, exit to the right...
Birth sign: Not entered
Date created: 1998-06-22 23:20:25
Last updated: 2021-04-14 17:18:08
Poem ID: 49988

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