blackout by: EDNAMYC [part one] he took me out… bought me gifts and said he cared… spoke of the dreams that we shared; he loved the way my beautiful black hair fell from my crown like a queen; played ignorant to my self-esteem. it was love as though it seems. shattered dreams burst the seams of my heart; but, from the start; a smile. his charm… let’s wait awhile. so we did; like little kids with our clothes on, sexual relations to our favorite song; on the phone all night long… but like vintage wine, we aged… writing new pages in my diary, romancing each other in stages promises of non-intercourse before engagement… now, i feel strange. situations, rearranged; using fingers to point the blame; he wanted to talk, so i came… he took me out… conveyed feelings about me; explained to me that he cared… mutual feelings that we shared. into my eyes, he stared at me like i was a whore; began feeling on the silk that i wore. the same silk that he tore lay strapless on the floor. he was never like this before… he said that we were going to the store… thirty-five minutes past four… i’ve had enough; no more. fight. fists in flight, yet, an effortless plight to disengage with all my might. praying for daylight to break; caught between the lock and the break; caught between the door and the lake. i can’t believe that this is taking place. so, i shout… frantic screams remind me of nightmares instead of dreams… a typical horror movie scene… trying to talk to your teammates when stuck on the side of the opposite team. yet, i shout… frantic screams bounce off the windshield like echoes… ‘let go… please, let go…’ and so, i shout… yet, he entered without the right key… the pain hurts deep inside of me… the pain hurts too bad for me to see… the pain hurts too bad for me to see… [blackout] cymande coburn….1997 9/30/97Birth sign: Not entered
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