When I was a little girl,
I believed in true love...
I believed that one day
I would be placed
On the path of time
Just at the same moment
As him...
And he would appear.
He might look unfamiliar -
Yes, at first I did not see his eyes
Lighted
Behind a sheet of glass;
But, I would come to know
The grief involved
In meeting - My Loving Half.
My Loving Half is not the same,
You see,
As Half of My Love...
You will learn,
The words are similar...
But, you must read more deeply.
For, My Loving Half is a man,
(My male counterpart)
Who shares much with me...except, my gender.
He is my equal, so it might seem.
For so many years
I sang my Cinderella songs
While mopping the floor -
I believed
A dream IS a wish your heart makes...
And no matter how your heart is grieving,
If you keep on believing -
The dream that you wish will come true.
I believed,
Oh, I believed in Grimm's
And Anderson's and the like.
I still do believe...
I heard of him and saw him
Many miles away,
He had a throne (of sorts)
And a kingdom (of sorts)
And a bevy of beautiful maidens (well, sometimes)
Vying
For his undivided attention.
In his court he played his somber songs
Of her broken promises
And his broken heart...
And I, at the tender age
Of three-quarter-score years
Fell into utter pity for his sadness.
Oh, woe! Oh, woe! - I was lost.
I kept his picture by me,
Listened to him
And sang with him...
As our voices wound themselves together
In almost tangible threads,
But, beyond the glare of others.
No one knew how much I cared -
Not my family,
Not my friends,
(Why suffer the humiliation?)
And certainly
Not him...
So, to My Loving Half, and my heart,
I made a silent promise each day...
That someday
We would meet.
I made that silent promise,
That someday he would meet me...
Or, see me from across a crowded room -
And be struck by Cupid a thousand times.
Oh, what a love
That grew deeper...
Much like loving
A great piece of art,
A great piece of music,
And a great thinker of our time -
All rolled into one magnificent gift.
But, no...I failed to even see
The HUMAN in him.
It was as if he was made an adult statue
And breathed to life,
In a sort of alchemical, mystical way...
He could not be human, could he?
Why, yes he could;
So, I quickly imagined him having Earthly faults -
(All the better to deal with him someday, I presumed)
In my mind.
I did make him have SO many faults!
But, I found
Much to my dismay,
His imperfections made him...more perfect.
Years of cruel time tick by,
While he, My Loving Half faded into the backround.
After all...
Who in these times could wait like Cinderella?
(I could have...)
Fairy tales don't come true,
Especially not in Brooklyn!
(They do, oh, they do my friends...)
So then, on this path of life
I was 20 years of age,
And out
In bright summer sunlight
Out of nowhere
- plopped -
A most conspicuous being to me.
He sat, and talked...
And his eyes
- yes, his eyes -
Were also behind glass...
Not a television screen,
But tinted shades of some sort.
We conversed,
And I laughed...
And I don't remember when exactly it happened,
But, at some point
While his sunglasses were off
I looked into his eyes
...And my poor pauper was discovered -
I had discovered the other Half of my Love.
I had discovered someone I knew
- In backward time
- In forward time,
Who could (unfortunately)
- Read my mind.
I unfortunately could also read his -
Unfortunate,
Because I spoke with my mouth all too often
What my mind thought...
And he would speak far too often
- The opposite -
Until years later, to reveal the truth...
Then try to re-bury it.
I became love sick
And
Mentally sick
From this teasing game,
It left me on the doorstep of the fine line...
- So, I stopped it all,
I put an end to it
No matter how much it hurt me.
Months before,
He knew that I liked My Loving Half,
And this caused him to throw out
Jealous remarks on occasion,
Such as:
Why do you like him? I think he sucks.
Followed by a nasty imitation of his voice and music...
Right after I finally stepped off
The merry-go-round with Half of my Love,
Right on my birthday, as a matter of fact,
My wishes
From several birthday cakes,
Cartons of cigarettes,
And shooting stars
Came true.
I met My Loving Half.
My Loving Half pulled me aside,
Out of everyone in a crowded room,
And wanted to take me out to dinner.
He took me out, at the age of 22,
On my first date...
And on New Year's Eve 1998,
His lips were on mine when the ball dropped...
2 things Half of My Love
Never gave me.
And it's been months and months now,
But the funny thing is -
It always seems to be
That when My Loving Half is busy and not around,
Half of My Love plops into my life again...
We seem to go round and round
On that merry-go-round,
And whenever I decide to get off,
It seems like My Loving Half is waiting for me...
So, what do you do when you are me?
- 2 men who I care for in my own way
- 2 men who have made some wishes come true,
- But, 2 princes who croak like frogs on occasion?...
I know, that's why I'm single.
E.A.Altamura, Copyright 1999
Reason for writing:
This piece of writing accurately depicts my relationships (as strange and warped as they have been sometimes) with the two greatest loves of my life.
Birth sign: Not entered
You need to log in to edit this poem if it is yours.
View more poems by Lizzard/Aries-Cancer-Pisces.