Desire of She

by QTSNM - Aquarius

There she lay, in my arms
No life in sight
I pray that god will give me some sign
I looked at her eyes, sealed with no life
Giving no truth to the world behind them
Blinding me to what she is feeling
It happened so fast
Was it the ice or that man?
Whom after a glance was missing
No longer with this world
I brush her hair away,
Away from her eyes
Trying to see deeper
Past the beauty of her presence
In to the godsend that is before me
To hold her life in my hands
The delicate hair she has
Fine and soft to touch
The red I desire to see, smell, touch
So soft I could live but just touching it
Live forever in this fantasy
A sigh from her, awakens my mind
Back to reality, the truth that lays before me
Looking at her eyes, shut and with out life
Damn it, why could I remember
Her eyes, ones I loved to see
Why didn't I treasure the time I looked
Looked for a reason
Ones I could gaze at all day
Look in to there depth and understand.
Dampness surrounded my eyes
The moist ground growing as her life flows away
Leaving that amber red mark
"God why", I ask myself repeatedly
Looking at that blank stare
That smile that is no longer there
The smile I oh so desired to see
To show me hope as it once before
That brought that smile to my soul
The one that kept me here for so long
I hugged her tighter, trying to keep her life
Not letting it slip away
I desire that smile, come back bring life
The pain engulfs my reality
I caressed her cheek, those freckles 
The face I desired to see each day
The face I prayed for, from the maker
Who made her this girl, one I could not resist
The one I treasured for so long 
I kissed her cheek, for the first time
Something I dare not before, I was afraid
For there is this girl I love, but never kissed
I hazy glaze over my eyes prevented me to see
My pain dripped from my face on to hers
I would just love to have five more minuets
To tell her my soul, tell her all
Say sorry those many times
And forgive her for all my pain
All the pain of loving her, all the pain I would forgive
Lifting her head closer to my chest
I wanted to scream, fill this silence with some hope
All that came out was a cough
The amber red, that filled the street, splattering around
The weakness in my soul began to emerge 
Fighting the pain, the pain I never felt 
I gathered my strength my courage
Took off my coat, my warmth, on this cold December night
Covered her body, give her all my feelings
Placing what's left of my soul in to her
Kissed her what was our last kiss
Placed my head upon hers
Hugged her more than I have ever felt
Closed my eyes and prayed
"Be where I am going, I love you now and forever I will"

Reason for writing:

    This was inspired by a person I care deeply about, she is one I would love to be with. But thats not to be for now.    

Birth sign: Aquarius
Date created: 1999-11-29 00:45:52
Last updated: 2021-04-14 17:18:10
Poem ID: 53881

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