Confessions of a Wandering Heart

by J James - Pisces

i'm here way too early
but i sit here comfortably waiting 
for a full sunrise to surface
i'm not here on purpose i guess
a case of lost nerve got 
the best of me again
i'm seeing things in different shades like
those gold leaves who seem to evade
the sun on this not so happy hour type scene
last call for nightime stars
the bars are closed and so are 
the roads i traveled through
that got me right back where i started
i darted towards the closest closet
that made me feel like home
roaming these forever changing scenes
seems like old hat to me
since stability has never hit homebase
i save a space in my head for 
the thought of what she said
a place to rest my heavy head
full of thoughts about nothing
huffing and puffing about the one
who got away you know
that day
on the pier
the fear of drowning in my space
gave my face a new shade of disappointment
sharp turns and rugburns
got me this far
the tar that decorates my worn sole
could've told stories
my mouth was too dry to say
my days are filled with disarray
and mental foreplay
and i replay those moronic scenes to ease
your amusing display of affection
for my charming imperfection
the alarming reinvention
of a person who once had
no direction and no intention of
being on the wrong side of the tracks
but infact knew where she was going
but had no place to go
no time for the fashion show
for your minds to blow
cant be late
for the shop-n-go of original thinking
left to sit on shelves 
why think themselves
when the blockade of cliche's
clear the way for redundancy
like all those hellos and i love yous
that sounded good at the time
when you couldn't find the time
to keep me in mind when
even i appreciate the
loud mimmetry your love
wields like a sword in the dark
only a spark ignited the flame
but the blame falls upon you
who so casually put the fire out

Reason for writing:

    um just started sitting outside my school earlier than i should have and then morphed
into a much larger idea...and so on the monster grew lol    

Birth sign: Pisces
Date created: 2000-02-07 02:07:38
Last updated: 2021-03-03 14:41:47
Poem ID: 54671

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