Your child is gone and each day is a chore, and your friends think your grief should end and your life should go on as before. But you know your life has changed forever. We understand. Or the brother, who was your best friend, has died and the void in your life is unbearable. And you cry a lot. We understand. Perhaps the sister you shared every thought with was taken from you so suddenly, the plans you made will never be, and no one can take her place. We understand. If the grandchild you loved with all of your heart is gone, and no one else knows your pain. And you're angry. We understand. Maybe the tiny life you held in your arms was so fragile it just couldn't last, and it struggled to breathe but it wasn't enough. Now they have no future--no past, and so you grieve. We understand. Or the child you adopted, and wanted so much, was taken from you before it could grow. And you'll never know what might have been, and your heart is breaking. We understand. If you watched with helplessness as your loved one was ravaged by a disease that still has no cure, And if only God would have taken you instead. You'd have given your own life, you're quite sure. We understand. Or the suicide that ended their life, left you with such guilt, and thoughts that you failed them. And you're sure if you realized the depth of their despair; you would have done something--anything to prevent it. But you just didn't know, and it hurts so much. We understand. Your child was murdered and you feel cheated that they will never grow old. They will never marry. They will never have children. They will never achieve their dreams. It's so unfair. We understand. Or the step-child who worked their way into your heart, and gave you so much joy that you loved them as if they were you own, was taken from you, and you wish they were here to brighten your day for you miss them so. We understand. Or the suddenness of their death left you with no chance to say good by--so your tears haven't dried. And you just want one more chance to hug them and kiss them. We understand. Do you often look for signs that your loved one is near, like a butterfly or an angel? We do too. We understand. If your loss is so great and you can't talk about it, not even to your best friend. And no one knows what to say if you mention your loved one's name again and again; So they shy away to leave you alone in your sorrow To deal with your pain and you just can't face another empty tomorrow. We understand. And whether your grief is new, or your loss was many years ago, the anguish you bear is still strong. There's so many things to remind you of them--a photo, a toy or a song. There is help if you need it. Just come here and share Or sit, and just listen, and know that we care. We'll hold you, enfold you, and help you to deal with your loss. For we are the Compassionate Friends--and yes, WE UNDERSTAND.
Reason for writing:
I wrote this in December, 1999 for a memorial service for a group called The Compassionate Friends. It is in memory of all the children and siblings of the members. Every effort was made to consider any type of loss they may have experienced. I pray that you may never need my group, but if you do, contact a group in your area. This is a nationl
organization. It really does help. Please feel free to email me and I will be glad to help you.
Birth sign: Leo
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