Have you got a brother or sister? One who screams and shouts? One with whom You’re forced to share your room Who always leaves his things about? Well, there’s cash in unwanted siblings: From age three to a hundred-and-five! Sell the old ones now ‘Cause there’s no telling how Much longer the buggers’ll be alive. You see, we put them to work in the African jungles As elephant bait and such. You would think they dislike it, But ho! Once they’ve tried it, They really don’t mind it that much! And you should see them with candy, those tiny M&Ms, Lettering each one by hand. Never a complaint -- The sweatshop’s quite quaint! We’ve the brightest M&Ms in the land. So, you see my point? Why put up with siblings? It’s truly as wonderful as it sounds. If you act today, There’s even extra pay For each boy over one-hundred pounds! So, have we got a deal? There’s much cash in your siblings. Go on and think; take your time. One sister? -- oh, <i>two?</i> Well, that’s double for you! Whoops... You’ve just been sold for $2.99.
Reason for writing:
Sometimes, I'd like to sell my siblings. But I'm sure they wouldn't mind selling <i>me</i> either. (Sister in background: "Get off the computer! Mom told me I could use it next!")
Birth sign: Virgo
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View more poems by L. Carthage Semple.