I walk now with the shadows, Treading ever so carefully, For fear I will sink further. I am, already, Tightly enmeshed, Deeper than a corpses tender caress, In the thickly coiling grey. It twines with whispers, Through my mind and heart, body and soul. When it reached that last, That piece I had hidden away, I think I screamed. Screamed until my lungs rent, And my tears ran cold with scalding, Some part of me screams still, Silently now, ever so silently, As all my real emotions are. I am changing, Have changed with the dark and despair. The brutality of cold infects my eyes, Slivers of ice sharp enough to cut others. My heart stopped living a long time ago, Packed up quietly one night and moved away. I can feel the vacant lot, still there, Windswept and lonely, Where once it made hope its merry home. I wish, Sometimes, I could claim devotion to something higher, That I am suffering for a cause, Living for dignity, Integrity or a promise, But the truth is, I don't know why I'm living, Or more, perhaps, I don't care. But then, If I am truly honest, I know I am not living at all, I am just not dead. And that is not so bad most of the time, Apathy can be a friend, With its muffling cocoon, And mantra chant, You can't be hurt, When you don't care, You can't be hurt. Still, Every once in a while, Somebody else, Touches the grey, Kisses with the faintest ring, Of fading seconds, And how others are living them, And then, I would cry, If, Only, I could........Birth sign: Virgo
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