losing a friend in the stars

by devon vega - Taurus

am i the one holding this fantasy together? i know we can 
never see each other again. i know our hearts will never 
beat together under the same sky that hovers above us. i 
know the space between us will never be shortened. on and on 
i may carry your flame...to every hill. to every road, be it 
dark or alone. in my mind, i will forever be the bearer of this 
what you have given me. a perpetual gift. i know that we were 
allowed a moment in time. i know that, dark as i may have 
appeared sometimes, i always shone for you. in me there was 
and always will be a young soul crying out in silence. a
kindred to your own as i know you understand that we are one. 
that is why we cannot be together. i tried to give you all of 
my wildest desire. i wanted you to ride this storm out with me. 
i wanted to find my place in life with you. but time has crept 
up on me. i know we will probably never see each other again.

beyond the stars there exists a place that i call home. it is 
all i have ever wanted...to return to the place that rises into 
space. i want to find my heart there...along with all of the 
good people that have lived before me. i want to walk in the 
light of a huge, ever-growing, life-force. i know i have this 
life-force in me. i know you have seen it. i cross through 
this great rift of ether and seek you out. i drain myself out 
onto the cold floor and feel the very earth try to swallow me 
up. just as life was given to us, i know that we will all return 
to that place in eternity. our souls touched and talked. we 
sang and danced. we laughed and found pleasure in who we are. 
i believe that there is more to life. i know that when our 
moment comes, we will probably not be expecting it...just 
as i wasn't expecting you. i never knew what i was doing 
when i was with you. i never realized that you were burning 
into me like a burning hot knife...not of pain, but of
happiness. i felt you stabbing my heart with incredible joy 
and intense beauty. i could only admire you and hope that i 
never lost you to the craziness of life. i promised you that 
i would be here forever...i'm  still here. i may not be 
visible...perhaps my words will serve as proxy to the me
that you came to know. i only hope that you can hear me 
every once in a while...calling your name...but, i know you 
can't hear me...i speak just the same. its better that i 
find your ghost in the shadows...here next to me.

go on and enjoy the little treasure you have been given, 
my dear heart. cross on over back to where you belong and 
never look back. i can only bring you sorrow and pain. 
these things are meant for times of true suffering. you are 
in a fantastic place now. your heart has been given the 
opportunity to rise above and beyond the world of everyday 
living. your heart has found its place and will remain there 
forever. i can not look on you anymore. not like this. i cannot 
find the words to tell you how much i am missing you. 
perhaps...maybe when all of the hurt has finally turned over and 
found something better to do than wait around for you...perhaps 
then will i find a cure for my desolate emptiness. i will 
be over you on the very first second after i have passed away. 
only then will i return to my home and wait for you there. i 
will cast down unto you all of my wisdom and will offer you 
protection from the fates...even though you don't exactly believe 
in fate. i do. i believe it was fate that drew us into a strange 
union. it pulled us away from our daily routines and made us
see each other as we were walking the same river-trail...on 
opposite banks. we met up at the first bridge we came to...what 
i will forever call our bridge of sighs.... we stopped for a
while and held onto what we were given. we walked away from 
this bridge and resumed our stroll down this glorious free 
journey. our paths came to a serious break and we let go. 
i watched you find your way back to your side of the 
river-trail, as i found mine. and i watched you breathe away 
into a dream. i fell for you then and found myself in front 
of a new world. a world that i wanted so much for you to be 
a part of, but, you were. i gazed at you and saw my life 
being carried away. you had on your side an angel and a 
prayer. your angel was your guide. your prayer was mine.

i know you're out there. i believe you are. burn brightly 
wherever you are...so that i can look to the sky and see 
you...just as i remember you...my dearest friend.

Reason for writing:

    i had a true friend, 
but she was taken away before 
life could unfold.    

Birth sign: Taurus
Date created: 2000-06-02 02:48:12
Last updated: 2021-04-14 17:18:11
Poem ID: 56364

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