im okay today although nothing is going my way i have made the peace to remain sane even though life puts me through a tremendous amount of pain i try to understnad alhtough nothing is explained through all of this unfairness a leveled head i maintain im open to suggestion if any is brought about but even in my optomistic viewpoint shines a little doubt i look into my invisible future with it's dark swollen eyes and i start telling myself lies like everything will happen naturally just you wait and see i look in the mirror and see less and less of me i was always the goos girl responsible and tall i was always expected to be so big in a world so small i have been there for others in my own weak pain im suppose to be so strong even though im only nineteen i feel so old like ive been here for so long why am i pressured to do things i have little knowledge of like sex drugs and a faith up above why is it expected of me to lead a bright life to bare children cook clean to become someones wife what was i suppose to do when my whole world was crashing down put on a smile be happy and make little sound everyone else was allowed to go insane i was the one expected to hide all the pain others dealt by hurting the ones around them they could not see im my mourning i did only things that would later hurt me now im in hell and my life is destroyed all my mistakes eat at my heart and leave a void the emptiness and loneliness does not go away daily i wonder what compels me to stay i need the empty spots to go away for my life to make sense my future is like this horror movie keeping me in suspense i thought i understood my life but now i feel confused i feel like god stuck his middle finger up and yelled you lose
Reason for writing:
im confused about my future and now im not sure what im gonna do in the future so i needed a outlet to express my pain and that outlet is poetry for me
Birth sign: Cancer
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