I still remember the hall The long white corridor The constant beeps Phones Chatter from people in a hurry Those screams God, those horrible screams Of pain Of death Of hell And that doorway The doorway that led to the reality That I had denied Refused You lay there IV’s sticking from your arms Pale Barely breathing Someone that gave me life That gave my life meaning Now being threatened of her life Of her joys Of herself You were a nightmare to me Something I didn’t want to face That I couldn’t face At so young of an age 12 I was just a baby Still learning about life And death And you I couldn’t let you go And I still remember going to school each and every day Never knowing Whether you’d be there when I got home And never showing the tears to my fellow students They’d have called me different Looked at me in pity Felt sorry for me And then came the day that you came back to me Said that you were better That you were ok And I loved you More than ever before For fighting For not giving up For being my mom But now the scare is back And you’re terrified Of losing one of your own One of your babes Your only daughter And now you are faced with the need of protection Of getting me through This horrible mess And I have the responsibility of coming to you Whenever there’s pain A lump An odd mark Some sort of clue That I have gotten what you had had All because I’m a girl Mother-daughter And you’re scared as hell that one of these days The tests will come back The tests I now have to take every year Will say that the nightmare is back And that there’s no hope this time But mom please Just hold my hand We’ll get through this time Just like the last We’ve been through too many cancer deaths We can’t lose hope now.
Reason for writing:
My mom had cancer when I was twelve. She eventually had surgery and had it taken out of her but since she had a feminine form of cancer that is easily passed on mother to daughter, she now worries about me. And starting this halloween when I turn 18, I'll have to have a yearly check up. I have to report to her whenever I feel unusally tired, or I feel a lump, or when I have an odd mark on one of my beauty marks or anything. We just recently had two people die last year from our family of cancer but I'm trying my best to think positive. There's no point in worrying.
Birth sign: Scorpio
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