The phone rang. One time too many. The dog barked all night. My husband moved out. After a really bad fight. I cried until sunlight. Then poured a cup of coffee. He didnt' come back. For Ten years. The phone rang one time too many. My pockets are empty. Dear God, Forgive me. Because my hands are shaking. And that's not the half of it. Got laid off last year. now I'm workin for minimum wage. even had to apply for public aide. they approved, only to deny it. I say somedays, I wonder if I can survive it. Wonderin where we gon get that next meal. Makes me wanna kill. Because it is the only freedom I know. Maybe the kids, will be the first to go. I'll spare them this misery. They wouldnt be in this situation if it weren't for me, giving them life. If only we didnt have to experience this strife, I could end it all with the flick of a knife. When they screamed "Mama!" the way kids do, then giggled childishly, and I fell asleep, I didnt want them to see me weep. Or know that weariness had overpowered me. I forgot how to smile. The Phone rang one time too many. I've been searchin the ground, for a penny. Wondering where we are going to get our next meal, makes me want to kill. I prayed I'd get a deal, but looks like we gon be on the bus, I lost touch with my sensiblity, much like I did when I lost my virginity, screaming for life. . . Laying in a pool of blood, with my hand on the knife.
Reason for writing:
And No, I dont want to kill my kids or anyone else's children for that matter (for someone dumb enough to ask me).
Birth sign: Aquarius
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