Keeping Up With The Jones's

by Phil Yarborough - Aquarius

Keeping Up With The Jones's 

His girlfriends got a paper- round
She's been around the block,
Her mother's loose, she looks like a moose
She's a pro at handling rock.
With her knickers at her knees, she'll give you the keys
And ask if it fits her lock.

Her husband's grey, he's turning gay,
You can tell from the clothes he buys,
Everyone knows which way he goes
So to them it's no surprise.
His son's in jail, his first name's Gail 
He says he's a woman but we all know he lies

Their house smells stale; it's up for sale
It has been for several years.
Their waters like paste, but they never waste
When it's bath time then everyone shares.
The carpets old, it's covered in mould
But so's the settee, so no one cares.

The TV's broke so they all snort coke,
They steal off each other.
Their eyes go red as it gets to their heads
After their last line they have another.
Big sister downs turps and then she burps
And goes to meet her lover

He calls her sweet, she gets in the seat
And tells him her going rate
She sees that it's small, and fakes it all
And tells him he was great
He pays her cash, and she's gone in a flash
His wife's home in a state.

These are the Jones's; they're living down your street
They're wasting self-respect.
They're the ones who block the drains
But from these, what did you expect?
Birth sign: Aquarius
Date created: 2000-10-02 16:59:03
Last updated: 2021-03-03 14:42:49
Poem ID: 57792

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