I love bagels With so much butter And cream cheese That you could feed The majority Of the starving population, Following a nice tepid Cup of tea To waken me in The morning light, I love lounging around The house naked, Feeling natural as I can be, Letting the neighbors kids Peek in the windows, So they can run to school On Monday When the weekends over, And excitingly tell What they've seen, I love arguing With the mailman, Just so I can cause Him a bad day, Then leaving him Home made cookies later, So he doesn't throw My unimportant mail In a mud puddle or ditch, I thought about scanning My wonderful breasts And sending them to you Of course for a laugh Cause I love humor, Or go to your house When you're not there Just to change all Your clocks back 20 minutes, So you can know What it's like to be late Like me, I like mumbling words Under my breath So you ask what I said And I tell you I didn't Say a thing, I like driving in the middle Of timbucktoo, Not knowing where I am Or even how to get back, So it takes me hours To get home, Cause I like being lost, I like to act like a retard Dragging my leg, And stuttering words In the local stores Just so I can ride around And have fun on the Motorized shopping carts, I like sneaking On church property At night, To fuck in the pews Just to be daring, I love messing with waitress's minds' By telling them I want this And when they bring it to me, I tell them that's not what I ordered This is, Only on special occasions though! When I'm so angry I love going to the Top of the hill Where it's secluded, And no one can hear me and scream at the Top of my lungs To let the frustration out, I think it's fun To start swaying of into traffic, Just to see The driver slam on his brakes, And laugh cause I never was in dangerBirth sign: Virgo
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