would i still be me

by Dolls - Pisces

life has been hell for me
i've been threw everything
form teen pregences to drugs
to even losing my mother
threw it all they've always 
said look at her
like i can't hear
what they say
about me 
i can hear it all
i know i'm not a mother
i know i'm not prefect
i know my mother left me 
i know my father loves me
i know my older brother misses me
i know my little brother needs me
i know my older sister wants me to be like her
i know this all 
and i know that i can't turn around now 
and take back the things i did
i can't take back the day
i told my mom i loved her. and meant it
because i don't now
i can't take back the dad i told my dad 
i would never care
cause look at me now i care about it all
i can't take back the day i 
told my brother i'd see him later
no one knew i never would
i can't take back the day i
told my little brother to grow up 
that his act was getting old
cause i only want to see him standing 4' nothing now
i can't take back the day i 
told my sister i never wanted to be like her
cause she was ugly and annoying
because look at her now as prefect as anyone could be
i have all these thought runnig threw my head all the time
all day every day
i know i shouldn't think about it so much
but how can i not 
they are all a part of me 
and i can't help but think
what if....
what if my mom still loved me
if... my dad still knew i cared
if. my brother never moved away
if....... joe hadn't grown up so fast
if..... heather wasn't so pretty
would i still be me?
the me i am today
the me they all want to love?
or would i be you?!

Reason for writing:

    i just had a lot on my mind cuz it was 7 years ago today my mom left me my sister and little brother..... so it just got me thinking    

Birth sign: Pisces
Date created: 2001-04-18 23:56:01
Last updated: 2021-03-03 14:44:08
Poem ID: 62132

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