i felt alone.
felt suffocated in a lot of ways.
everywhere i went,
something was choking me
keeping hold of me.
i couldn't escape.
felt like i was running away from something
no matter what,
it kept running after me.
felt like whatever i told people wasn't the absolute truth.
nobody would ever understand what was happening.
they always tried but never could get a handle onto how i was feeling.
felt trapped.
as though there was nowhere else to go.
couldn't escape him.
couldnt escape his hands,
his mouth,
his breath.
felt his hands on me.
tasted his mouth.
felt him inside of me
no matter how many times i took a shower or made myself throw up,
he was still there.
couldn't sleep because i was too scared.
everytime i went to bed i would dream of him killing me. yet i was scared to stay awake cause i knew i would see him.
feel him again.
he wouldn't let go of me.
i was chained and the only way out was to end everything. let go of everything.
just give up.
it was the only way to stop the bleeding.
only way to stop the pain.
the gagging.
the fear and depression seeping from my head.
i had
no
way
out.
Reason for writing:
came out when asked how i felt during the beginning of this year
Birth sign: Scorpio
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