My Head Hurts

by DopePope - Libra

Dark and cloudy the future brings
It brings us to the uncertainty
That only it foresees and other things
Can I do it? Can I succeed?
Will I suffer? Should I die?
Do I have to bleed?
Should I just end it now?
Get it over with, the future scares me
I am a coward, can I go...how?
I see myself in charge, but losing it all
Then I see myself nowhere at all
No one to protect me, now I must fall
I’m 20 I think I see, or am I old?
20 is old enough to me, it doesn’t matter
I’m on my own, "leave" I am told.
This is my fault, I bring it to myself
I can’t leave now; I’m on my road
No turn off in sight, poor, or wealth
I’m all alone again, dark and blue
The colors I see, don't ask why
They just come, no matter what I do.
Is this normal? I can’t tell
I just want to cry for eternity
Deep inside my own created well
Inside my head I’m killing me
On the outside I want it
But I’m a coward both ways...see?
Not only do I want the quick way out
I’m not even willing to
Do what I need, I just need to shout
And then these guys on TV say poems don’t need to rhyme
Well they do or they suck
It true to me anyway...
Ugh! This is too much I just want out now
Got to find a gun, or some pills
A knife is too messy, sharp...ow
See what I was saying?
Too lazy and afraid
This sucks a lot, I forgot all my praying
God may love me, but this part sucks
Maybe he wont be offended
If I cut this part short, with any luck
Now I’m off, to cry in bed
To be with myself
Inside my ugly depressed head.

Reason for writing:

    I always find myself staring into nothing, for no reason. When I ask myself i always see what could happen, what might and will. It hurts.    

Birth sign: Libra
Date created: 2001-07-04 00:55:17
Last updated: 2021-03-03 14:44:37
Poem ID: 63710

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