Contradiction His words linger on my memory of last night Like fire flies- they flicker- illuminating moments Only to extinguish when ebony shrouds my thoughts They seem to outlast memories of us, but they contradict the night that he enveloped me in. They make me happy Only to leave me something to measure my sadness against As I draw the shades on the day, Thoughts of him steal my breath away Minute by minute they alternate I want to apologize Yet wait for him to say “I’m sorry” I convince myself that I do not love him, and then his voice captures my heart I bully myself into not calling, and then pick up the phone at my first weakness I am afraid of pain, yet crave the joy he gave me I love him, and then I love him not.
Reason for writing:
I broke up with my boyfriend of two years and wrote this months afterward. This poem was written one night after he called me, and I found myself once again caught up in thoughts of him.
Birth sign: Scorpio
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