staring into the sun

by Antwan Fields - Aries

in a gas station in arizona i see myself about ten years from this day
a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other hand
for miles i can see nothing but brick-hard sand
and i remind myself that i brought this upon myself
fell in love too often and now this is where i am
in hell, my life ruined, my potential spent
it comes to a halt as i stare at the sun, hoping my retinas burn out
and i take a swallow of beer and supress the urge to pout
so i won't see this anymore, this pain i feel because i followed the crowd
my career, my love, my life under a heavy black shroud
this is what i came to, my pride and my stubborness got me here
with a cigarette and a piss-warm beer
as i get up i realize that i followed the crowd too much
my wife comes out onto the porch but i jerk away from her touch
i did not want to get married, but this is why i hate
the 2.5 children, why i'm an enemy of the state
but this is why i'm gay,i love on my own and i'm not dumb 
this is the trouble i MUST stay away from
and so im not the fat, depressed angry guy in this story, and if i become one
thats my way out: to stare into the sun.
Birth sign: Aries
Date created: 2001-10-08 20:01:22
Last updated: 2021-03-03 14:45:10
Poem ID: 65358

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