Internal Dialogue

by A.N.M. - Pisces

In the stillness of the night
When most have found their slumber
Restlessly I try to find my way---
A "paper fumbler"...

Through years of written poetry
Or "diaries" of thought
To somehow get a "gist" of me
Just what I am...or not.

"The little girl" so frightened by
Her fathers' mental illness?
The "woman-child" with feelings piled
On top of unfulfillness?

The "lover" of a greedy man
Who had me in his grip?
The "independent working gal"
Who finally took a sip

Of having a "successful" life
With money, house and car?
Who realized all too quickly
I was STILL not up to par!

Now at a place where life's O.K.
And really can't complain--
I wonder why I still feel lost
Like life is just inane.

"Meaning" is my fervent goal...
A never-ending quest...
Until I die I'll question "why?"
A "student" at this "test"...
One day I'll get some rest
I know...one day I'll get some rest.








Birth sign: Pisces
Date created: 2005-09-28 23:22:04
Last updated: 2021-03-03 14:46:53
Poem ID: 70958

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