I didn't get the job Boy oh boy I was mad as heck All the trouble I went through to gussy up Damned high-heeled shoes, like to broke my neck I stroked and dabbed and juicied up my lips Just like the magazine said I piled my long sorrel tresses on top of my head Down one side I let a few trail past my shoulder The mirror said beautiful Pretty as a clear summer day Then he came a rollin' In a chaufferured sleek black car Hospitable like I open the door Smiled my best southern howdy Welcome to the Amazon Ranch Quietly he said there must be a mistake Like lightning it came to me (There sure was!) This wallflower of a man My good friend and (FYI) gay neighbor Would have yawned and called him prissy This man was searching For one of them there soft pale creatures That hardly ever eats and inhabits Those concrete mountains I have heard called buildings In my mind I saw them as a place to visit Why would I ever want to live there I like green grass and I'm very partial to fresh air So I gave him directions on how to go to hell I stomped back up my rose lined porch steps Launching those fucking high-heeled shoes as I went I needed to change my bio in the singles magazine It should have read If you don't like your women a little bit wild Self sufficient and mean With a heart as big as the state of Georgia Then Mr. keep on going cause I ain't your type I want a man that knows peaches are best when they're ripe Then we can talk hellos, benefits,and options and... About the full time job of I dos
Reason for writing:
Just for fun and to show what contradictory creatures we really are.
Birth sign: Leo
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