something all the same

by Elisa Hinson - Aquarius

you don't write anymore
                        he said

           a statement bourne more
                   from his own self accusation

                         but hurting just the same


as we sat

lights blacked out
with electrical tape
and blankets
and another shot
of 151

his boxes lined up in the hall

                       

                         again


       i could have said something

                 anything

but didn't 
                         again

                    remembering all the shit
                        that i had poured out
                   
         in the hospital waiting room
               waiting on my mother

    at funerals where i wondered
              if it was worth it to 
         ever have loved
                         

                            in the back room
                                during parties
                             as the music played on
                                   and i waited
                                for the next one
                             to move in

           always hands
                full of hunger
              mouths numbed
                     with pills
                  and hearts
                      full of hell

    waiting to be filled


             i have never been one to meet
                       obligations
                   have only ever wanted 

       to be needed
             and found


throwing words
        out to so many others

not wanting to 
face them

on screen
until now

         










Birth sign: Aquarius
Date created: 2009-02-23 23:43:04
Last updated: 2021-03-03 14:47:11
Poem ID: 71932

You need to log in to edit this poem if it is yours.

View more poems by Elisa Hinson.